• Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Skank factor raised

    Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Skank factor raised

    Remember yesterday when I said these awesome previews better live up to the hype? Yeah, so they didn’t. All that drama with ambulances, Graham running off when offered a rose and someone getting lost in the jungle? Yeah, well Graham was thirsty and Lacy had the runs. Talk about over-selling, geesh.   Lacy pukes in the middle of the rose ceremony. By “in the middle of”, I mean, she ran to a toilet and then puked in it. She’s been […]

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  • Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Everyone’s eggs are in everyone’s baskets

    Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Everyone’s eggs are in everyone’s baskets

    These two nights better deliver on all this drama – these previews are bananas! Bring it on, you hopeless crazy people. Also, sorry this is so late. Busy day…and I still have to watch tonight’s show!   Robert/Sarah Date    We start the show with Robert asking Sarah out on a date, which sets Michelle off. She’s crying, pissed and oh so lonely. She’s hot and normal-ish, but she’s all, “EVERYONE HAS SOMEONE. I WANT SOMEONE!” and I don’t dig […]

    Read more »

     
  • Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Bitches Be Crazy

    Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Bitches Be Crazy

    Elise scares me. How much of this crazy is editing? I fear not enough. And what’s with all the metaphors? In the storm of reality TV, this show is my rainbow.   Despite her obsession with Dylan, within minutes, she has become obsessed with Chris. “I’m really glad I gave the rose to Chris.” Ummm, you barely did. You tried to give it to Dylan who said no, and then you gave it to Chris because he was the only […]

    Read more »

     
  • Bachelor in Paradise – Too much amazingness to choose from for this title. Wow.

    Bachelor in Paradise – Too much amazingness to choose from for this title. Wow.

    There’s actually almost TOO much to discuss. I mean, I could write for days on this episode. I have no clue where to even start. So. Much. Grossness. Mr. Putz    Crazy Michelle K. left last week but apparently she started banging Mr. Putz, a NOT smart crewmember, right before they started filming. Harrison tries to talk to Michelle about the drama and she refuses, saying she doesn’t need to talk to Chris because “he’s just the host”. I mean, […]

    Read more »

     
  • Bachelor in Paradise – Should I watch or not? I’m 80/40.

    Bachelor in Paradise – Should I watch or not? I’m 80/40.

    I bet this entire series is a set-up social experiment…for US, the viewers, to see just how shitty a show can be and still draw in millions of viewers. Like me. Because I tell ya people, I was SUCKED into this shit.   First of all, what a fucking fuck fest. My god. Second, what a T and A fest. My god. Lastly, what a showcase of somewhat-hot, stupid people. My. God.   Herpes-Dise Cast   Clare, 33, Juan Pablo’s […]

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  • EMILY HARTRIDGE PRESENTS: 10 REASONS WHY…BEING A MODEL SUCKS

    Emily and Tessa make us laugh. We thank you. XO, LMVO

    Read more »

     
  • The Bachelorette Recap – Oh Nicky. Not cool.

    The Bachelorette Recap – Oh Nicky. Not cool.

    Nick! You dick. More on that later.   Nick Meets the Dorfmans    The Dorfman family scores a free trip to the Dominican Republic. Nick gets totally dressed up to meet Andi’s family, complete with a baseball-type jersey and forgetting to brush his hair. But he wins points by bringing mom flowers and dad alcohol. To which sister replies, “What the fuck? Am I chopped liver?”   Ah yes, Andi’s dad, Hy. You can tell Andi got to him and […]

    Read more »

     
  • The Bachelorette Recap and Colon Cancer? Say What?

    The Bachelorette Recap and Colon Cancer? Say What?

    So here’s the scoop. My mom was diagnosed with colon cancer last week. Needless to say, it’s been a shitty five days. I am also now sick as a dog since I’ve been crying and not sleeping… and the fact my kids are sick too and they like to cough RIGHT in my face probably didn’t help. All of this means I’m not writing a Bachelorette recap this week. Let’s face it – this show is the same goddamn thing […]

    Read more »

     
  • The Bachelorette Recap – Soooo many damn siblings

    The Bachelorette Recap – Soooo many damn siblings

    I’m tired.   Milwaukee with Nick    We start in Milwaukee, Wisconsin with Nick and his big ass family. They start with a tour of the Milwaukee public market. Nick says, “I like spending time here.” That’s weird. Don’t you say, “I like going here” or “I like buying cheese here.” To say “spending time here”, feels like he comes and does Tai Chi outside of it.   They go to a brewery next. I feel like going to a […]

    Read more »

     
  • Misadventures in Motherhood: No More Babies, Please

    Misadventures in Motherhood: No More Babies, Please

    This whole second baby thing is really and truly happening, my friends, and her expected date of arrival is only eight days away.  Aside from the requisite terror at the idea of parenting two children under the age of two, mostly what I’m feeling is excitement that in just a few short days I will no longer be pregnant.  I loathe being pregnant.  I hated it the first time, I’ve hated it just as much this second time around, and […]

    Read more »

     
  • The Bachelorette Recap – The Dry Hump Episode

    The Bachelorette Recap – The Dry Hump Episode

    This week there are two one-on-one dates and one group date but there is only a rose on the group date oh my god I don’t give a shit about this show anymore. Andi’s frownie face is also wearing on my last nerve. And I keep waiting for someone to express a concern again and then she gets all pissy pants and shuts down. She’s fun.   Six guys left, we’re in Belgium and this entire episode is about Nick’s […]

    Read more »

     
  • MAMRIE HART’S YDAD: QUICK SHOTS- HeyUSA BAKED ALASKA

    DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE, YA DRUNKS! Grace and I are going across the country in our new travel web series #HeyUSA! http://www.youtube.com/astronautswant… Follow me here: http://mamrie.tumblr.com http://www.twitter.com/mametown

    Read more »

     
 

Recent LMVOS

  • Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Skank factor raised

    Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Skank factor raised

    Remember yesterday when I said these awesome previews better live up to the hype? Yeah, so they didn’t. All that drama with ambulances, Graham running off when offered a rose and someone getting lost in the jungle? Yeah, well Graham was thirsty and Lacy had the runs. Talk about over-selling, geesh.   Lacy pukes in the middle of the rose ceremony. By “in the middle of”, I mean, she ran to a toilet and then puked in it. She’s been […]

    Continue reading »

  • Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Everyone’s eggs are in everyone’s baskets

    Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Everyone’s eggs are in everyone’s baskets

    These two nights better deliver on all this drama – these previews are bananas! Bring it on, you hopeless crazy people. Also, sorry this is so late. Busy day…and I still have to watch tonight’s show!   Robert/Sarah Date    We start the show with Robert asking Sarah out on a date, which sets Michelle off. She’s crying, pissed and oh so lonely. She’s hot and normal-ish, but she’s all, “EVERYONE HAS SOMEONE. I WANT SOMEONE!” and I don’t dig […]

    Continue reading »

  • Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Bitches Be Crazy

    Bachelor in Paradise Recap – Bitches Be Crazy

    Elise scares me. How much of this crazy is editing? I fear not enough. And what’s with all the metaphors? In the storm of reality TV, this show is my rainbow.   Despite her obsession with Dylan, within minutes, she has become obsessed with Chris. “I’m really glad I gave the rose to Chris.” Ummm, you barely did. You tried to give it to Dylan who said no, and then you gave it to Chris because he was the only […]

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • Bachelor in Paradise – Too much amazingness to choose from for this title. Wow.

    Bachelor in Paradise – Too much amazingness to choose from for this title. Wow.

    There’s actually almost TOO much to discuss. I mean, I could write for days on this episode. I have no clue where to even start. So. Much. Grossness. Mr. Putz    Crazy Michelle K. left last week but apparently she started banging Mr. Putz, a NOT smart crewmember, right before they started filming. Harrison tries to talk to Michelle about the drama and she refuses, saying she doesn’t need to talk to Chris because “he’s just the host”. I mean, […]

    Continue reading »

  • Bachelor in Paradise – Should I watch or not? I’m 80/40.

    Bachelor in Paradise – Should I watch or not? I’m 80/40.

    I bet this entire series is a set-up social experiment…for US, the viewers, to see just how shitty a show can be and still draw in millions of viewers. Like me. Because I tell ya people, I was SUCKED into this shit.   First of all, what a fucking fuck fest. My god. Second, what a T and A fest. My god. Lastly, what a showcase of somewhat-hot, stupid people. My. God.   Herpes-Dise Cast   Clare, 33, Juan Pablo’s […]

    Continue reading »

  • EMILY HARTRIDGE PRESENTS: 10 REASONS WHY…BEING A MODEL SUCKS

    EMILY HARTRIDGE PRESENTS: 10 REASONS WHY…BEING A MODEL SUCKS

    Emily and Tessa make us laugh. We thank you. XO, LMVO

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • The Bachelorette Recap – Oh Nicky. Not cool.

    The Bachelorette Recap – Oh Nicky. Not cool.

    Nick! You dick. More on that later.   Nick Meets the Dorfmans    The Dorfman family scores a free trip to the Dominican Republic. Nick gets totally dressed up to meet Andi’s family, complete with a baseball-type jersey and forgetting to brush his hair. But he wins points by bringing mom flowers and dad alcohol. To which sister replies, “What the fuck? Am I chopped liver?”   Ah yes, Andi’s dad, Hy. You can tell Andi got to him and […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap and Colon Cancer? Say What?

    The Bachelorette Recap and Colon Cancer? Say What?

    So here’s the scoop. My mom was diagnosed with colon cancer last week. Needless to say, it’s been a shitty five days. I am also now sick as a dog since I’ve been crying and not sleeping… and the fact my kids are sick too and they like to cough RIGHT in my face probably didn’t help. All of this means I’m not writing a Bachelorette recap this week. Let’s face it – this show is the same goddamn thing […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap – Soooo many damn siblings

    The Bachelorette Recap – Soooo many damn siblings

    I’m tired.   Milwaukee with Nick    We start in Milwaukee, Wisconsin with Nick and his big ass family. They start with a tour of the Milwaukee public market. Nick says, “I like spending time here.” That’s weird. Don’t you say, “I like going here” or “I like buying cheese here.” To say “spending time here”, feels like he comes and does Tai Chi outside of it.   They go to a brewery next. I feel like going to a […]

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • Misadventures in Motherhood: No More Babies, Please

    Misadventures in Motherhood: No More Babies, Please

    This whole second baby thing is really and truly happening, my friends, and her expected date of arrival is only eight days away.  Aside from the requisite terror at the idea of parenting two children under the age of two, mostly what I’m feeling is excitement that in just a few short days I will no longer be pregnant.  I loathe being pregnant.  I hated it the first time, I’ve hated it just as much this second time around, and […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap – The Dry Hump Episode

    The Bachelorette Recap – The Dry Hump Episode

    This week there are two one-on-one dates and one group date but there is only a rose on the group date oh my god I don’t give a shit about this show anymore. Andi’s frownie face is also wearing on my last nerve. And I keep waiting for someone to express a concern again and then she gets all pissy pants and shuts down. She’s fun.   Six guys left, we’re in Belgium and this entire episode is about Nick’s […]

    Continue reading »

  • MAMRIE HART’S YDAD: QUICK SHOTS- HeyUSA BAKED ALASKA

    MAMRIE HART’S YDAD: QUICK SHOTS- HeyUSA BAKED ALASKA

    DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE, YA DRUNKS! Grace and I are going across the country in our new travel web series #HeyUSA! http://www.youtube.com/astronautswant… Follow me here: http://mamrie.tumblr.com http://www.twitter.com/mametown

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • EMILY HARTRIDGE: 10 REASONS WHY..YOU SHOULD WATCH THE WORLD CUP

    EMILY HARTRIDGE: 10 REASONS WHY..YOU SHOULD WATCH THE WORLD CUP

    Emily Hartridge presents her top reasons for loving the World Cup. We can’t get enough!  

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap – Do you Faaahrt in public?

    The Bachelorette Recap – Do you Faaahrt in public?

    I’ve said this a lot but I really mean it this time. Ohmygod this was the most boring episode ever.   Eight guys left and they’re in Venice. Nick (33 year-old Software Sales Executive) gets the first one-on-one date. Also, my friend called him “untamed vagine head” last night. It’s so amazing I can’t take credit for it.   Nick Date    I can’t put my finger on it, but Nick kind of sucks. More on that later. They start […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap – Bachelor Mimes and French things

    The Bachelorette Recap – Bachelor Mimes and French things

    We’re down to 11 dudes. The gang heads to Marseilles, France and Andi tells us she loves it there because it’s “a huge port area”. Or, a PORT. I must be in a salty mood, to quote one young bachelorette, if I’m making fun of that. It’s gonna be a long night.   Chris Harrison, looking ever so French in that turtleneck action, sits with Andi and asks if she’s falling in love. “STOP”, she replies. No YOU fucking stop. […]

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • EMILY HARTRIDGE: 10 REASONS WHY…PERIODS SUCK

    EMILY HARTRIDGE: 10 REASONS WHY…PERIODS SUCK

    Title pretty much sums it all up. Yes, they most certainly do but at least Emily makes us laugh..

    Continue reading »

  • MAMRIE HART’S YDAD: JOHN GREEN NAPTITUDE TEST

    MAMRIE HART’S YDAD: JOHN GREEN NAPTITUDE TEST

    A little something different for your asses. Also, this is what I’m like sober. Weird right? GO SEE THE FAULT IN OUR STARS! And obviously subscribe to John because he is a much smarter person than me. https://www.youtube.com/user/vlogbrot… DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE, YA DRUNKS! Follow me here: http://mamrie.tumblr.com http://www.twitter.com/mametown

    Continue reading »

  • Misadventures in Motherhood: Girl, You Crazy

    Misadventures in Motherhood: Girl, You Crazy

    Now that I’ve been a parent for almost a year and a half, I can tell you without hesitation that there are some batsh*t crazy people out there who are raising children.  I’ve written about this before in the context of our preschool search, but now that the Muffin Man is older and we’re involved in more groups and, therefore, exposed to a multitude of other children and their caregivers, my eyes have been opened to the fact that people […]

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • The Bachelorette Recap – The full of sad shit episode

    The Bachelorette Recap – The full of sad shit episode

    Did I miss the transition to New England? What the?   We’re down to 13 guys, which makes for a long ass summer, people. The kids are at some large, yet odd, hotel in Connecticut. Dylan gets the first one-on-one date – let’s go.   Dylan Date    They apparently have an entire steam train to themselves for a day. Andi comments, maybe their relationship will pick up steam. Ba dum dum. Do you think the producers sit around and […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap – My new biggest turn-off? Opera Singing.

    The Bachelorette Recap – My new biggest turn-off? Opera Singing.

    This week, Andi decided to get out of LA. That’s right – ANDI decided. She just lifted up production and said, “Yo, we’re going to Santa Barbara. I booked a room at the Bacara.” This show is so stupid.   Nick Date    Nick, the 33 year-old Software Sales Guy, gets the first one-on-one date and I have this dude totally figured out. He likes to pretend he’s SO COOL and way too good for this whole thing, but actually […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Recap – Sadness, lots of lube and a drunk.

    The Bachelorette Recap – Sadness, lots of lube and a drunk.

    Oh my god I can’t handle the Eric stuff. This is heartbreaking, people. How was he not married already? What a catch. Sad sad sad.   So we’re down to 19. Good lord that’s too many. This week, the guys check into the mansion. Nick says, “Staying in a place where so many people have fallen in love makes me hopeful that this is where my love story starts.” There are so many things wrong with this sentence. For one, […]

    Continue reading »

  •  
  • Misadventures in Motherhood: Third Trimester Terrors

    Misadventures in Motherhood: Third Trimester Terrors

    We’re in the final countdown before Baby Number Two arrives, and I have to tell you that I had completely forgotten how horrible the last few weeks of pregnancy are.  I don’t know if my lack of memory has to do with pregnancy brain, or all the pot I smoked in high school, or how the endorphins from childbirth erase your memory in order to ensure survival of the species, but whatever the root cause, I’m remembering now just how […]

    Continue reading »

  • The Bachelorette Season Premiere Recap – Meet the Dudes. And their hair. And their gayness.

    The Bachelorette Season Premiere Recap – Meet the Dudes. And their hair. And their gayness.

    Let’s just address the elephant in the room. I’m a day late. I won’t let it happen again. OK I’m not promising that, but I’ll try REALLY hard. Sorry, peeps.   Here we are again – Another season of the Bachelorette, complete with an overly qualified chick (albeit slightly annoying), and twenty-five guys, which at least half are homosexual. Oh and who was thrilled to find out the show was only 90 minutes!? That’s a win in my book. I […]

    Continue reading »

  • BEST THING EVER (OR AT LEAST TODAY): RODENTS ON TURNTABLES

    BEST THING EVER (OR AT LEAST TODAY): RODENTS ON TURNTABLES

    We love this so much. Internet, you have a winner today. XO,LMVO

    Continue reading »

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